How to Get Through Deployment While in a Relationship

Ever since United States’ tension with North Korea, the recent U.S. Navy shipwrecks, and Trump’s announcement of sending more troops to Afghanistan, I have been weary of the possibility of my husband being deployed. I am fortunate enough that I have been through one deployment with my husband, and know what life is like as a military spouse while he is away. Here are some tips of how you can get through a deployment with your significant other:

Have a Support Circle

When my husband was on deployment, I decided to stay with my family so I can have a support circle. Whenever I was going through a hard time, or just need someone to help me keep my mind off the fact that my husband was on deployment, my friends and family was there. I was able to console in them, and they were really supportive. It was also helpful to reach out to other military spouses who has been through a deployment.

Keep Yourself Busy

It was a great distraction to have family events almost every weekend, outing with friends, and a full-time job. Although my husband was always on my mind, keeping myself busy enable me to not constantly worry. I didn’t constantly sit in my own misery because I miss my husband.

Keep a Journal

Deployments can cause a strain in the relationship from time to time. Sometimes there are things that I wanted to discuss with my husband, but because I don’t want to cause him any stress, I wrote things down in a private journal. Relieving negative feelings and thoughts through writing was very cathartic and made me feel better.

Gather Items for Care Packages

One thing that I look forward to during my husband’s deployment was gathering items for care packages. In the care package, there were items my husband requested, letters, pictures, USB with videos, small presents, and surprises that I put together. It was fun, and there was always great anticipation when my husband received the packages. (Stay tune for a post about Care Package ideas)

Remain Positive and Strong

Deployments are no walk in the park. It can truly be a testament of how strong the relationship is. There will be tough times. Communication is super limited, which can run doubts and concerns through your mind. Just know that this temporary separation is with distance. The love for one another will always be there, as long as you are patient and resilient. Reassure each other as often of your love, and don’t let the negative thoughts overtake the relationship. Once the deployment is over, you both will be stronger than ever as a couple.

I know that deployment can be hard, but there are ways to cope with it. In no time, your loved one will be home with you. If you have experience deployment(s) with your significant other, what are your tips on how to get through it?

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Surprise! We are pregnant!

I know I haven’t posted in a while, and that’s because recently I’ve found out that my husband and I are pregnant! On June 8, 2017, I surprised my husband that we are expecting! This will be our first child and we are thrilled to start our family. This baby is the first grandchild on my husband’s side of the family, and 10th grandchild on my side of the family.

Everyone was overjoyed to know that we are expecting and I have the feeling this baby is going to be super spoiled! We feel so blessed with this pregnancy and all the support from family and friends. Below I made a video compilation of me surprising my husband, and us surprising both our families.

Pregnancy Symptoms

For the past 3 months, the pregnancy took over my well-being. I had nausea, food aversions, bloating, constipation (sorry, TMI), exhaustion, and very low energy. I went from going to the gym 4-5 times a week to once a week. Instead of steadily gaining weight, I lost a good 5lbs.

I am now 15 weeks, and finally in my second trimester. I’m feeling great and my energy has come back. I am trying my best to gain back some weight and going to the gym more often. Overall, my baby is healthy and my pregnancy is progressing well.

Boy or Girl?

Our next appointment can possibly tell us the gender of our baby. Comment below what you think we are having, a boy or a girl?

Military Spouse Appreciation Day

Today is Military Spouse Appreciation Day. I’ve been blessed to be with the man of my dreams and the love of my life. He has served the U.S. Navy for 5 years now, and we have been married for one and a half year. Being a military spouse has made me realize how underappreciated wives/husbands of service members are. Often times, military spouse leave everything behind to be with their husband/wife. A lot of patience and responsibilities fall on the military spouse so their significant other can serve the country.

USS Harpers Ferry LSD-49 Homecoming (September 12, 2016)

In my experience as a military spouse, there has been ups and downs being married to a sailor. Half of my marriage was spent long distance because my husband was on deployment for 7 months. At that time, we’ve decided that I would stay with my family until he was back. I got myself a better paying job, made sure our savings account was growing, and arrange all the travel while focusing on new home search for us.  When homecoming came around, I left my job and family and moved from North Carolina to California to be with my husband. Finally, we were able to live together as husband and wife.

Distance from North Carolina to California (2452 miles)

A month after I moved, isolation and loneliness set in, especially when my husband has duty (24-hour shifts on the ship) and went underway (3-4 days out at sea). All the romantic thoughts of being married to a service member of the U.S. Military began to fade. While he was off serving the country, I cooked, clean, and made sure everything was in order so my husband won’t have to worry about a thing when he gets home. My pursuit of a career as a graphic designer subsided and my priority was to support my husband.

I wouldn’t change a thing about being a military spouse. The only thing I would have done differently was to give thanks to all the military spouses that have held their families together while their significant other was serving the country. They are the silent heroes. They are the one who defends the home front for many soldiers. They are a big part of America Strong. If you meet a military spouse, please give and show appreciation. Although it’s not easy for us as military spouse, it is definitely all worth it.